The Mean One: You’re the…the…the…
Contains spoilers!
He’s the one we can’t call the Grinch! In recent years, it seems to be the trend to take iconic, beloved characters and turn them into horror, killing monsters, Winnie the Pooh: Blood and Honey (2023) being one of the most talked-about examples of this. The year prior, though, director Steven LaMorte decided to throw his hat into the Yuletide fire, and thus we have The Mean One, an unauthorized adaptation of Dr. Seuss’s How the Grinch Stole Christmas. The film tells the story of Cindy (Krystle Martin), who must defend the town of Newville from the Mean One (David Howard Thornton), who goes on a killing spree around Christmas.
To put it plainly, this movie isn’t exceptionally good. Every actor puts their all into the material, but it misses the mark. However, the movie is a blast, and it’s easy to see the filmmakers having fun trying to incorporate every part of Grinch-lore they could so it could be parodied. After being forgiven by Cindy, the Mean One’s heart grows the traditional three sizes, explodes, and kills him. Yeah, this movie is fun. If you were told to make a movie about a killer Grinch, I doubt you’d be able to produce anything better than this.
As mentioned, the film is an unauthorized version of Seuss’s story and, therefore, can’t use the Seuss terminology. Whoville is Newville, Cindy Lou-Who is simply Cindy, and the Grinch is the Mean One. There’s even a character named Dr. Zeuss (John Bigham), who drinks from a bottle branded Geisel. Two for the price of one! One of the best comedic parts is Zeuss and Cindy are discussing the Mean One and Zeuss is about to call the Mean One by the Grinch name. They’re interrupted by a bartender, who shouts, “FINCH! I HAVE AN ORDER FOR MIKE FINCH!”
The action and kill scenes are simultaneously ridiculous and hilarious. During the climax, Cindy performs a summersault away from the window she’s positioned at. There’s no point for her to do the random summersault, but I suppose the rule of cool abides; I even rewound the film so I could make sure my eyes weren’t deceiving me. Later, Cindy is hunting the Mean One with a shotgun wrapped in candy cane wrapping paper. I don’t think wrapping paper improves a shotgun’s shooting capabilities, but it’s a detail that is right at home with the rest of the bonkers stuff in this film.
I tuned into this movie for the sole purpose of watching David Howard Thornton’s performance, having discovered him as Art the Clown in Damien Leone’s Terrifier series. I finished the movie thoroughly entertained, clapping and cheering as we dashed through the film and its creative massacre. This is a movie I’ll return to during the Christmas season, and I can’t wait to rewatch this nasty wasty skunk wreak his own version of Christmas horror. Yahoo Dory!
Cast
David Howard Thornton as the Mean One
Krystle Martin as Cindy
John Bigham as Doc Zeuss
Chase Mullins as Detective Burke
